Quiet thunder on a cloudy day
nothing uncommon about that
but the sky is very quiet today
the earth is rumbling instead
walk closer to the edge, boy
dare to dance upon the rim
no need to look down now
come and dance upon the rim
below resounds the thunder
gaze down to see the cause
waves breaking on the stone
savage destructive beauty
sit here on the edge, son
dare to look into my eyes
can you feel the power
as you look into my eyes
stalwart stone guardians
stand resolute in their duty
protection against the attack
defending land from sea
live upon the edge, child
feel thunder under your feet
know my total dedication
feel thunder under your feet
this battle will last forever
water slowly eroding stone
until at last stone falters
patience will win again
listen to the thunder, lad
feel me in your bones
wearing down the stones
feel me in your bones
When you write like this, I can almost not stand it because it's so incredible. This poem not only provides a visual image of standing where you stood, but it also speaks volumes about a sense of drama and strong emotions.
ReplyDeleteIt also seems like an echo of the poem you wrote awhile ago about standing on the edge of a cliff and stepping off into the unknown, but the message here is different.
One message here is the enduring nature of strength of character. But you do it with an "almost" rhythmic quality without always rhyming. That last stanza is haunting and much like the waves, pounding, pounding with each line.
I'd like to turn this into a song if I can and if that's alright with you? It's beautiful.
ReplyDelete~Pie
Bravo, my friend... bravo :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this resonating experience captured in words. Once again, you've allowed words to flow out touching others with a deeply personal experience.
~Rain
Very powerful imagery. Lovely
ReplyDelete